I have tried so hard. I wake up and clean up my bedroom. I wash my dishes as well then write or just surf on the internet.

As I go back from my work, I clean myself up and eat dinner. Also, I watch TV, write and join many writing competition and go blogging. I have bought some books to read too. I always stay up and sleep at 12 o'clock at midnight. Once I wake up I do the same things. I also watch korean drama, too. I make myself as busy as possible.

But...........
I can not set up my night as I set up my day. I cannot take control my dream as I take control my schedule. No matter how blurred it is, it seems so absolutely damn clear at night. No matter how hard to get rid of it, it continuously come into my dream. And it seems just like the real one, I can taste the feeling, too. I can smell the scent, I can see the face, I can feel the touch, I can look at the eyes. The same dream, the same shadow, the same damn bothering night. I sleep at midnight hoping that I will not dream anything and please time runs fast. Suddenly, sun comes and I feel safe.

It is just fantasy I have to throw away. So please, I never welcome you to come to my day, so don't come at night. Don't make my effort useless. Don't come and give the glad feeling, but end up with nothing once I wake up.

Don't bother me. If I don't have to sleep, I won't. Really.

posted from Bloggeroid